How To Attract Your Soulmate

One spiritual mentor’s tried-and-true formula

By Natalie Miles

When we’re searching for love it can feel like an uphill battle. We’re looking for that deep connection. The spark, the attraction, the passion. The irony is we’re living in a time where to truly connect with people is more difficult than it’s ever been, a problem infinitely compounded when entering the world of “online dating.”

We’re bombarded with articles about how to manifest a soul mate in 10 easy steps. We’re asked to create lists of what our desired soul mate will look like, what job they will have, how funny and charming they should be. Before you’ve even stepped out the door (did you remember to brush up on the 5 simple ways to dress beautiful?!), exhaustion has already set in and the effort seems needlessly excessive.

The Secret

I choose me. This mantra given to me by my spirit guides has led to a truer connection with myself. It has brought me abundance in all areas of my life and career. But the area where it guided me most is in romantic love. Choosing myself actually led me to find my soulmate—on Tinder no less!

I lay in the bath one evening after another disappointing Tinder date and received the message loud and clear from my spirit guides: I choose me. It was a massive wake up call. I realized I had spent most of my teens, twenties, and early thirties waiting to be chosen by others. Are the cool kids going to accept me into their group? Will coach pick me to be on the team? Is he going to ask me on a date? This moment in the bath was where I realized I’d become so disconnected from myself and was waiting for validation from others to find my inner connection.

How To Attract Your Soulmate

It’s Not Selfish To Put Yourself First

“I choose me” isn’t being selfish. It’s about when you put yourself first, you’re going to become aligned and connected to who you truly are and what you love. You’re vibrating at your highest frequency so you attract what matches you. With dating, this helped me to no end. I stopped worrying if they were going to reply or not, even if their profile looked “perfect” and “this could be it.” On dates, I realized very quickly if it was going to work or not, instead of trying to make it fit as they could have potential. I got picky in a good way, as I was finally being authentic to me. It led me to finding my soul mate by swiping right, and to a true, deep connection with all the feels.

We’re All Feeling This

As a spiritual guide, meeting soulmates is always a hot topic and priority question in my one-on-one sessions. For everyone, the blocks to finding a soulmate is always a version of the same themes:

  • The ex they can’t emotionally let go of
  • The potential lover who won’t commit long term
  • In a relationship but it’s not right and can’t leave
  • The long-term singleton who is stuck and frustrated—will I ever meet someone?

Spirit always shares the same advice when people are stuck: I choose me. Choose yourself first and watch the transformations happen. So if you’re looking for your soul mate, I encourage you to use it as a mantra. It’s the gateway to get connected to who you are, and for you to be in the right vibration for you to attract your soul mate. Even on Tinder.

About The Author

Natalie MilesBorn and raised in the UK, Natalie Miles is a psychic, spiritual guide, and mentor whose mission is to support your spiritual journey by sharing The Spirit Upgrade. This upgrade connects people with their guides—in other words, cheerleaders in the spiritual realm. Spirit guides help find the answers one seeks, and clear any blocks in the way. Working with guides will heal the past and help people feel a sense of empowerment. Learn more at

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